Okay, there are no world-ending volcanoes erupting during the time this blog post was made. No, the author has not turned into a stone-like, ash-encrusted shape seen cowering in fear.
Nope. Sorry to burst your bubbles; it's just my current obsession, Bastille's Pompeii, and Things We Lost in the Fire. Give them both a listen. Thank me later.
Okay, on to today's rambling.
Wow. What a week. It would be foolish to say that these developments were unexpected, but I didn't expect everything to blow up like this real quick.
To be honest, I saw this coming. Heck, I even bartered with God to just let something like this happen instead of me having to be upfront about the true version of certain events. Again, I just did not expect events to blow up so hard, so quickly.
Maybe this kind of "blow up" is what God knows I need. All of the preexisting structures built up by my own stubbornness, my foolishness in believing that I alone can carve out an existence without God's help. And now, I have close to nothing. But Him.
And that's a good thing. I'm constantly reminded that all the things I've lost in "the fire" are all consumed by a God who's only desire is to see me live a holy and blameless life.
One of the terms we used in the last call center I worked for, being that we worked with technology, is "hard reset". This means purging information in the system of the device that has been causing it to bog down, or not function well.
And well, God has been performing a hard reset on me. Plain and simple. And I welcome it. A lot of things that I've lived with before, a lot of things that I've been accustomed or have grown to be okay with are now being purged methodically. I'm just fortunate that He has decided to leave a few things in me that still make me who I am.
Like being with the woman that I love. I don't deserve last night's surprise, and yet, He provided it.
All I'm praying for right now (and I know He knows this desire of my heart) is to not be the same person I was before, with regard to a whole lot of things - finances, relationships, work, and most importantly, my faith.
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